When the Olympics end, Shark Week begins. To celebrate the week of selachimorpha, we look at the top 10 songs we wouldn’t mind being mauled by a shark to.
10. Piebald “Shark Attack”
Who does not love a good shark attack song? Then again, I don’t think Piebald mentions a shark once in the entire song. I feel gypt!
MP3: Piebald “Shark Attack”
09. Hedgehog “Surf With Shark”
Chinese rock trio, Hedgehog knows what’s up. On their latest album, they included a track called “Surf With Shark.”
MP3: Hedgehog “Surf With Shark”
08. Tommy Noble “Shark”
I know if I were to get mauled by a shark, it would in all likelihood be to some hard electro. Getting mauled to Santa Barbara DJ, Tommy Noble‘s original mix “Shark” would not be that bad though.
MP3: Tommy Noble “Shark”
07. Lord Boyd “Shark Dad”
“Shark Dad” is the kind of dad I want to be. The kind of dad that lets his small child watch shark week programming even if some of it could be scary for younger viewers. Who cares? Its shark week and my kid has got to learn!
MP3: Lord Boyd “Shark Dad”
06. Hoodie Allen “Swimming With Sharks”
Hoodie Allen maybe using the imagery of swimming with sharks as a metaphor but lets just pretend it is literal for the purpose of this list. Who wouldn’t want to get mauled by a great white while listening to everyone’s favorite under 30 Jewish American rapper?
MP3: Hoodie Allen “Swimming With Sharks”
05. Tracy Bonham “Shark Can’t Sleep”
From my years of watching shark week program, I am fairly sure that sharks can indeed sleep. Maybe not sleeping is what makes the sharks ornery and ready to kill?
MP3: Tracy Bonham “Shark Can’t Sleep”
04. Misfits “We Bite”
Whenever I listen to the Misfits classic “We Bite” during shark week, I like to imagine Jabberjaw singing it. Not in his potent Jabberjaw accent, just like Jabberjaw has the singing voice of Glen Danzig and he’s rocking out singing “We Bite.” Just imagine it while you listen to the song and thank me later.
MP3: Misfits “We Bite”
03. The Bouncing Souls “Shark Attack”
“Those goddamn Jersey mooches” wrote one of the best songs to get attacked to with “Shark Attack.” Plus, the intro to the song is classic.
MP3: The Bouncing Souls “Shark Attack”
02. Dr. Octagon “Halfsharkalligatorhalfman”
With programming like Sharkzilla, I am surprised Discovery channel has not yet taken a cue from Kool Keith and done a show called “Halfsharkalligatorhalfman.” I mean Keith already wrote them the theme song, what more do they need?
MP3: Dr. Octagon “Halfsharkalligatorhalfman”
01. Surfer Blood “Swim”
The front cover of Surfer Blood‘s debut album, Astro Coast made them eligible for this countdown. Then to name one of their songs “Swim” and have it be this awesome…it just screams “maul me!”
MP3: Surfer Blood “Swim”
